My blog has moved! Redirecting...

You should be automatically redirected. If not, visit http://shithawksonparade.com and update your bookmarks.

sh!thawks...on parade: 11.2007

flickr twitter ghosts

30.11.07



hangman, hangman

yet another reason why im not a fan of organized religion.

personally, i'd be embarrassed if in the future i had to explain why my country was globally criticized because of a teddy bear.
you might be asking, why patm why are you sitll awake at 2:21 on a thursday night when you still have clas firady morning, why?
i'l tell you why, becuase we had our MPP christmas party tongith and then we went to the Oddessy lounge/bar/place where there is music and alcoholic type stuff.
it was fun. we dont really hang out with the second years umuch but they are pretty coool i have to say.
richard and i stuck it out for the first years, thats right, we were there the lastest, i dont know what everyone elese did butw wew were there the latest.
also,I FUCKIN MET GORDIE JOHNSON TONIGHT AND HE SIGNED MY GUITAR AND IT WAS FUCKING AMAZING AND I CAN DIE HAPPY NOW! AGAIN! because the firsty time i could was after i met ozzy, then was when i met matt good, but NOW I MET GORDIE JOHNSON AND HE SIGNED MY GUITAR!!!!!!!!
holy.fuck. the acoustic clinic he put on. so. fucking. amazing. like seriously, if youre a fan of big sugar and grady, you NEED to hear him perform the songs on an acoustiuc. i got On the Wagon and All Hell for a Basement on vid, so when i upload it tomorrow sometime i'll put it up BUT THEN EVERETT AND I ARE GOING TO TRHE GRADY CONCERT TOMORROW SO THERE WILL BE MORE GORDIE FUCKING JOHNSON!!!

hooly shit. i met gordie johnson. you have no idea how happy i am. it compltetly trumped the fact that it made me two hours late for the mpp christmas party. it was like meeting jesus. onyl better because jesus cant play the blues.

i haveto get up in fuve hours, so i am going to sleep nwo.

ALL HAIL THE FUCKING BLUES AND GRADY AND ALL THINGS GORDIE FUCKIN JOHNSON MAN!!!!!HE SIGNED MY GUITAR I AM SO HAPPY\1!!!!

29.11.07

this is the view from the window(s) in our class. except it's backwards. and less blurry. but hey, thats what you get for not brining a camera to class and using your iSight. what's that? oh, oh right, all those people in class without a mac dont haaaaave an iSight. aww, poor guys, they'll learn one day.

...yeah...



this next week is going to be like that scene in braveheart where the scottish army all runs like hell screaming to attack after mel gibson yells his speech and they're all like fuck it, let's give'r! i never actually saw breaveheart, but i'd assume that's what happened. anyway, this week, we're all just gonna give'r til next friday and then we can relax.

they took yer job!

28.11.07


so my sister emails me this thing where you can turn yourself into an elf, with the ever popular option to record a message that will also be mutated into a smoker's lung sounding version of Alvin & the Chipmunks.

of course, my initial response was ....o...k... like it usually is when my sister points things like this out to me, and then five minutes later i can't stop messing around with it. seriously, it's the way it works. for pretty much everything. she points it out, i go 'pff ok' and ten minutes later i think it's the greatest thing in the world.

she's very wise that way. or sneaky. or both. like a russian. either way. she started me on my Booster Juice addiction in high school, same with Homestarrunner, the Marble Slab, and as much as i hate to admit it, watching all the harry potter movies to name a few. except the last one. which im sure i'll end up watching at home if she has it on dvd.


of course, i reciprocate this by playing the Big Brother role when guys see her picture and go "wow that's your sister?" and i go "yeah, stay the fuck away from her or i'll pop you in the fucking head." it's true. it's a condition. i swear. and unless you are an older brother you have no idea what it is, therefore no say in whether it's wrong or not. every big brother knows about the Big Brother Condition. it still applies when she's over 21 and legal all over north america. actually, pretty much forever.

but it'd be worse if i were italian, and im not, so really, i cant be that bad.

i feel kind of restless which is annoying because i really want to sleep and im not sure how it's gonna fly if i feel more awake than sleepy.

-----

AHAHAHAHAHA tossed elf salad?

about a million cattle on the range

27.11.07

im starting to wonder why this still isnt in my dvd collection.

just keep swimming

for some magical reason, ever since i installed Leopard on Leonard, i've been able to connect to the wireless network at my place. Tiger never liked to do that, so I was pretty much relying on my clunky PC for internet access. but now i have glorious maneuverability all over.

im back to the world of insomnia. haven't really slept at all since saturday night. im not at the Ed Norton laying on the couch and seeing imaginary people who make soap point yet, but we'll see how close it gets. people in the class have started to notice. i think after two years is up i'll be the guy who couldnt sleep, got all his work done early, and scouted the other soccer teams before our games.

i have no more grandparents left now.

it's an odd thing to think of. you know that at some point it's going to happen, but when it finally rolls around, i dunno, there's not much you can really say about it. other than mine is a relatively small family, and now it's a little smaller.

i came home yesterday and tried to sleep. it was more like zoning out and dreaming with your eyes open. not quite sleep, but not quite wakefulness.

and then i wrote seven pages of nothing to do with school at all. it felt good. didnt help with the lack of sleep much.

im sitting here with a pile of articles and papers on my left that i need to put the final touches on one term paper, my guitar to the right. i decided where i want Gordie Johnson to sign it. hopefully.

my whole place smells like pinesol because i cleaned he floors last night.

one econ final, one paper left. staring them down like a poker bluff.

mick jagger lied, time is not on my side.

im going for dinner at the mob house tonight.

is that an interest or your ideal

26.11.07



not much for talking today.

25.11.07

Sixty days down in the barracks and hearing rusty springs

A bed, a bunk, dusty mattresses clinking metal frames

It’s 2am and all he can think about is the glint on the window

Subdued hues, the air is icy black echoing in his eye

It’s just not comfortable, turning this way and that

Draping an arm over the side, a precipice of man made proportion

He doesn’t even try to shut is eyes, he knows sleep won’t come

He hasn’t slept for days, canyons of fatigue with high walls

Where the sun rises and falls with regularity, but the shadows always change

Breath in, breath out, breath in

Fixing the cotton collar, shifting fabric is a cacophony in the chill air

Even with blankets drawn up the cold seeps in

Cold winds that settle into rest on a restless body

Breath in, breath out, no sleep will come tonight

Sixty days down in the barracks ends at daybreak and starts at nightfall



my grandpa passed away today. peaceful passage, grandpa fred, you will be missed by many.

did you find it much easier

people who actively encourage their children to scream on a crowded skytrain should be shot.

24.11.07

seven hours later he woke to find a face in the window
staring back in mute silence
with contempt for the pane of glass separating worlds
seven hours later he stood and saw a stretch of time
that had passed before him
an expanse of absolutely nothing rendered useful by sheer will
seven days later he found the door
i forgot that i dont have the Puscifer album on my Mac. so it's back to In Rainbows while i plug away at my Analyses term paper on youth voter apathy. im about half done, 2100 more words and it should be in the bag.

by the by, my Mac's name is Leonard Katsu. and my external drive's name is Nimoy. and my jump drive is Caulisse. or Kirk. depending on which slot i put it in. it has split personalities.

im kind of surprised that i was the only one here when i got here this morning. that hasnt happened any saturday for the last three months. now there's one other person here.

yesterday in class JR wanted to know how many of us would be interested in doing our summer coop in Bangladesh. There's six of us interested. i'm hoping the fact that i handed in my final paper early gives me an edge since only two people can go. im pretty much hoping i can go because it'll give me a much better chance at an application with CIDA after i graduate.

here's how i have made a bunch of life altering decisions in my life. i make no definite decisions at all. it's true. the odd thing is that for certain things, i'll be talking to people, or in class or read about something and then there's this little alarm that goes off in my head that goes "Do THIS!" it happened when i first heard about the Page Programme, it happened for a few classes ive taken that ultimately got me way more bang for the buck than most people got, and it happened when one of my profs last year mentioned the MPP program in class. it was like BANG! GET INFO GO DO THIS! and the odder thing is that i have just as much a chance at not getting accepted to any of these things as anyone else, but every time that bell goes off in my head about something i never get rejected.
so when we had a presentation from CIDA and Foreign Affairs a few weeks ago about the reconstruction effort in Afghanistan, it went THIS IS IMPORTANT FOLLOW UP ON THIS!

so here's hoping that once again my ability to make decisions by simply not really making decisions pans out and i get to work on some real international development work. because why not.

ok, back to the paper now.

some kind of conjecture

23.11.07


JR: "alright, so group 8 shall be presenting first thing next week, correct?"

K: "wait, isnt that the morning after the christmas party?"

JR: "and your point?"

my profs are wicked.

i got on the skytrain to come home today, and while it was sitting there waiting to leave, i started to zone out a bit and wonder about people who, everyday, try to describe the world in the most intriguing and descriptive ways possible. and then i looked around and thought, sometimes the most descriptive way to say this is "sitting on the skytrain waiting for it to leave."

deep. i know. it's cause im secretly a genius.

comfort is a mystery

22.11.07



so i get home after a morning lecture that half the class shows up to...see previous post, but you'll have to turn it up loud to hear...i handed in my Issues paper a day early cause why not, finished all my econ, played the Theme Song Game over lunch with other Policy folks, went to give'r at the last regular season intramural soccer game that we were all psyched for...aaaaaand we lost 6-1. we totally did not have it together AT ALL because we're hard working grad students who put so much time and effort into our work that it makes us play worse. truth. for serious.
anyway, i got home and there was mail stuck in my door and i went "IS IT???" and i looked and i went "IT IS!!!"
dear raymi,
you are a rockstar and mail from rockstars is totally cool and not even the people in the lab today who were snickering about people meeting people from the internets could argue that.
i am keeping it on the shelf where i keep all my concert tickets and set lists and erstwhile things that i feel should be displayed so when people ask about them i can go "oh THAAAAT old thing? well, lemme tell youuuuuu, what a story that is!"

since i handed my paper in early i've got some breathing room project wise. my plan is to finish my Political Analysis paper over the weekend, rock out some touch ups on methods tonight before Scrubs, leaving the next two weeks free for the methods term paper and studying econ.
and, you know, a christmas party and a Grady show and going to have Gordie Johnson sign my guitar because it's totally the right thing to do. i need to find an oil based marker cause i dont want this to rub off. ever. because years from now i will be rocking out and people will be like, what's that? and i'll be all "oh thaaaaat old thing? well, lemme tell youuuuuu, what a story that is!"

if there's a place called home i havent seen it yet



two minutes of class with iSight

21.11.07

i got sniped by a crazy leafs fan...

The rules: Each player lists 8 random facts/habits about themselves. The rules of the game are posted at the beginning before those facts/habits are listed. At the end of the post, the player then tags 8 4 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know that they have been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

1. once when i was little i swore that i saw a ufo. turns out it was a meteorite.

2. im switching my phone from bell to rogers after christmas cause im fed up with all the bullshit bell puts it's customers through.

3. im pretty ocd about keeping my fingernails short.

4. i never used to sleep on my stomach until when i was like 11 or 12 i got a super bad sunburn on my back at a friends place when he had a pool party and i had to sleep on my stomach for like two weeks after that so it wouldnt hurt like hell.

5. i only use Jim Dunlop Jazz III picks which often confuses and annoys other people i jam with cause they dont use small picks and i hate using large picks now. to the point where i actually play worse using regular sized picks than small picks.

6. i have never been off the North American continent

7. i dont ever fold or roll up my socks after i do laundry because they're pretty much all the same black socks, and the ones that arent are either grey or white and it's pretty easy to just pick and choose in the morning. i only roll them up if im packing to go on a trip.

8. when i was 7 i had to get a CT scan because my friend had his birthday party at Rundle Park in Edmonton in January. it was a sledding party and on my way back up this ginormous hill, some douche bags on a GT Sno-racer pegged me off, flipped me over and causing me to land on my head and black out for a sec. then i got up, went to the top of the hill, slid down, found my mom, told her i didnt feel good, so we went home, and as soon as i got in the door at home i was like PUUUUUUKE! oh man, and i had these really sweet ass winter boots that were pretty much like winter combat boots so they took forever to take off and i was really worried about barfing on them. they had red laces. anyway, so my parents offloaded my sister at another friends house and zipped me off to the U of A hospital emergency. so i got put on a hospital bed. this was before all the retardedly unnecessary bed shortages had occurred... so the nurses asked if i wanted anything while we were waiting for the CT machine to be ready and i asked for dinosaur books, and they gave me like a dozen and i started to go through them and proceed to argue the merits of why T-Rex was way better than Triceratops. i should mention, when youre 7, hospital beds looks huuuuuuuge. so i got rolled up to the elevator, and i thought it was great fun, and then i got to get on the table thing that goes into the CT thing and that was neat, and then the inside of it scared the shit out of me. but i was ok. no brain damage. at least that anyone's ever told me about...

ok, victims...

christina
danielle
jen
meg

yeh, need to find some more guys who live vicariously through the internets methinks...

soft talking dijon mustard

20.11.07


i picked up two tickets to grady on november 30th at The Plaza for $25. sweet. jebus. yes.
i have shamefully missed previous Grady shows five times now. it's a disgrace really.
but now i will see them in all their 'we're-not-quite-Big-Sugar-but-just-as-awesome' glory.
however, dilemma. we have our program christmas party on the 29th, and we're supposed to be there as close to 6pm as possible. actually, two dilemmas arise on this day...that's the quarter finals for intramural soccer, and second...INSTORE PERFORMANCE BY GORDIE JOHNSON AT LONG & MCQUADE FROM 6PM TO 7:30!!!!!!! far away from where we're supposed to be at 6pm.
so. torn. right. now.
and no, im sorry, but going to the concert on the 30th knowing that i could have sat in a room full of guitars and listened to gordie johnson play solo the day before is pretty much incomprehensible. not after the SGJ incident.
stupid schedule always full of stuff that doesnt agree with each other.

in other news, i seem to have lost the ability to follow a semi regular sleeping pattern, so im going to go try to sleep for a bit before heading over to the mob house to watch some more Band of Brothers.

do you think anyone else is paying attention?



if you're a fan of Deathproof you need to see the 1971 version of Vanishing Point. trust me.

i bet she hits all the bumps too

19.11.07


i have to say, this week isnt shaping up as bad as i thought it would be. i worked my ass off saturday to get a paper out of the way, our econ prof basically gave us the answers to this week's assignment, our methods paper isnt due til december 7th now, and the overnight essay im currently doing is easy as pie. half done already. the first part is debating the merits of brokerage politics and whether or not using that tactic offers a better chance for political parties to be successful on a national scale or if they need to identify regionally....fucking duh, i wonder what im going to say...
second part that i will tackle once i finish this here post and mayhaps take a stretch and walk around the living room involves discussing the infringement of rights based on gender in specific instances, ie, a woman firefighter who is not allowed on a hazmat squad because they may be exposed to chemicals that are detrimental to the reproductive abilities of females.
not so hard. we were all going off our rockers after class this morning waiting for our prof to email the thing out. like "OMG WHERE IS IT WHEN IS HE GOING TO EMAIL IT WHY ISNT IT HERE YET OMG I JUST WANT TO GET IT DONE!"
the last one took me probably ten hours to get done. im half done this one in under and hour and a half. im on a fucking roll.

overnighter artist of choice this time= Puscifer. last time it was in rainbows.

this is good. i can motor this thing and make it up to everett's in time to eat and watch Slapsgiving.

the final speaker on a glass

18.11.07

seeing as how im just about done the first draft of one final paper for this week, im gonna take a break and have another go at *drumroll* RANDOM FACTOIDS ABOUT YOURS TRULY THAT MAY OF BE LITTLE INTEREST TO OTHERS BUT WHAT THE HECK!!!

1. the first CD i ever bought was 'Fairweather Johnson' by Hootie & the Blowfish

2. i always try to get floor tickets to concerts. if i cant get floor tickets i will consider not going at all.

3. i absolutely hate it when i see kids at concerts on the floor.

4. i have a hoodie i got in high school when i was on the student council. it says 'Table Dancing' on one arm because that's basically how i broke out of my shell in high school. on a student council retreat. in the mess hall at some camp site, and I Would Walk 500 Miles came on and i figured, fuck it, and up i jumped and danced on top of the table and decided high school will be fun then. start of grade 11 btw.

5. i've taken two puffs of cigarette ever, four years ago.

6. my favourite book series is Deathlands. so when people ask me if i've read intelligent books that are all popular like when J-Pod came out, no, i have not. i am instead reading escapist, post-apocalyptic blood, guts n' gore cheap lit. this differs entirely from my favourite SET of books which are the Dark Tower books. BUT this differs entirely from my favourite SINGLE book which is Seize the Night by Dean Koontz.

7. i own three versions of The Lord of the Rings.

8. when i was little, jawbreakers always pissed me off because they took so much effort to get to the middle.

9. the first time i ever got to take the family car out alone was the same day as the opening ceremony of the 2001 IAAF World Championships in Athletics in Edmonton. i got sent to get milk or something. i kind of wanted to not go, and stay home to watch the ceremony all the way through.

10. i once ordered acon and beggs for breakfast in ottawa.

11. i actually like La Fin du Monde.

12. when i was 6 i started playing soccer. the first game i ever played was at the field in the park across the street from my house. i played in jeans because i didnt have shorts yet.

13. through most of high school you couldnt actually see the walls in my room because there was so much stuff on them. this trend continued well through university, only to suddenly come to a stop last year.

14. i used to hate using Macs. now i kind of hate using PCs.

15. i have a bottle of hot sauce i bought in ottawa that i had to sign a health waiver to buy because it's so hot.

16. most of the time i dont remember what day it is.

17. i firmly believe that Pinky and the Brain is the greatest cartoon to ever exist.

18. i took my high school english classes a year ahead of everyone else in my grade. so i took English 30 when i was in grade 11. any 30 level course in Alberta has a final worth 50% of your final grade. if the grading hasnt changed and i wasnt totally lied to about the marking, five different teachers mark them on five different categories. the exam has two parts; multiple choice and written response. i scored 100% on the entire thing and annoyed all the 12th graders i took the class with. i also helped three guys pass that class.

19. in grade 3 i got to meet Martyn Godfrey at a young writers conference. at the time, he was in my opinion the greatest author ever. i got to do a workshop with him which was superduper aaaaaaand he signed two books for me. i think i still have them at home somewhere... also, i didnt know he died until just now when i tried to find a link to him.

20. i first discovered guitar when i was 12. i really got into it when i was 16. i basically taught myself. my mom made me take lessons, but i never learned anything from them. honestly, when people ask me how to play, i just tell them to go and bang out whatever and you'll figure it out. also, i only ever tried to learn Stairway to Heaven once and have never attempted it again for the last four years.

21. i can play guitar, bass, banjo, mandolin, drums, piano, recorder (it does so count), played in a metal band, have halfway almost decent self recordings, and can make pretty decent sounding techno according to some people.

joey's tomato pie

17.11.07





















allow me to provide my perspective on the point at which i now find myself through a simple description of what my room looks like.

one pile of dirty laundry. one pile of clean laundry on the dresser that hast been hung up for two weeks. a backpack and two other bags in random spots on the floor on top of two belts. more paper on top of the bed than anything else. three keyboards, two screens, six browser windows open, puscifer on repeat, eating peanut butter out of the jar, five empty glasses, one plate, an assortment of post-its under the keyboards, keyboards under five separate printed articles on mass transit expansion, blinds closed, one chair, 700 words to go before the next assignment gets considered.

drunk with flour

16.11.07


id like to have this much free time

14.11.07












video

thanks to ryan smyth's biggest fan i got to go to the game tonight.

AND WE WON.

the last few days have been pretty long and tiring and annoying and i totally needed this for a boost.

the home crowd doesnt go insane

i now present you with a list of random factoids about yours truly, because i cant think of anything better to do.

1. i always brush my teeth before i eat breakfast

2. i usually go through a set of headphones every 8 months

3. lilo & stitch is, and shall forever be, my favourite movie ever

4. in high school my most used talent was reciting Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Army of Darkness and Full Metal Jacket line for line on a regular basis.

5. i used to only wear black tube socks. i have since moved on to sports socks.

6. i hate reality tv but if it's on i'll probably stop and watch it.

7. at least once a day i think about the Gibson SGJ at Rufus guitars

8. when i was little i wanted to be an astronaut, then a paleontologist, then a geologist, then i did none of the above.

9. i read physics articles in magazines in case i ever get into a discussion with a physicist and wont look like an idiot.

10. i used to hate onions and mushrooms.

11. i won a bronze medal in mixed doubles badminton in grade 8. that was the only school team i was ever on.

12. i still play with LEGO, and when i build a cool spaceship i get sad when i take it apart.

13. watching Star Trek TNG is still cool in my books.

14. the only tv stations i watch on a regular basis are CBC Newsworld, Discovery Channel, and the Food Network.

15. i was a member of the Canadian Alliance because they offered me a job but wouldnt let me work until i was a member. then i was a member of the green party. now they're all insane.

16. i never watched Saved by the Bell.

17. i hate to get really dressed up but i clean up real nice

18. i have over 12 pairs of shoes and 8 pairs of sunglasses

19. i arbitrarily decided to want to learn portugese when i moved to ottawa but never did.

20. i cheered for calgary when they were in the final against Tampa. then they lost and it gave me another reason to hate the Flames again.

it's a video of a dog pooping on a baby

13.11.07

here is an annoying factoid that continues on a semi regular basis... the wireless router for my place is upstairs in my landlord's sons room. there is the odd time when he turns the entire thing off, thereby effectively eradicating any possibility of a wireless network until he gets home whenever that may be.
today that happened to be pretty much most of the day.
i am surrounded by articles for one term paper. i fully intend to have 1000 words done before i go home. the only problem is that i got to 242 and hit the wall. i have far more sources than i actually need, meaning i have a total wealth of information meaning i have every angle of this topic covered in any number of journal articles and all i can do at the moment is stare at them incomprehensibly and wonder what i should write.

i didnt really sleep a lot last night.

apparently i look like shit lately. thank you. i have noticed also.

whats today? tuesday? in the next two weeks i have two econ assignments, three term papers, an overnight assignment, a survey to interpret, too much reading and something i probably forgot.

I AM GOING TO HAVE LOTS OF FUN.

perhaps i will get a hammer MADE OF WORDS and knock down this wall that will not let me WRITE ANY MORE WORDS! hah.


intention and impact

12.11.07


the light is growing old in years, reflecting off windows that have seen too many cracks and too few sunny days. steam vents on the sidewalk whisper curtains of fog, whisked away in wisps by a glint that pierces straight through the heart of a cloud hanging right in front of your eyes.
footfalls of the many drowning out the standing still of the one that runs through everything in spirit only, paralyzed in thought on the side of the road.
open your mouth, not a word will come.
open your mouth, your silence will bring the world to a standstill.
only the storm on the horizon seems to take notice, lumbering through the sky towards eyes that are never cast on the cracks in the windows.
take a step, the world will open its arms.
take another, swept up in the river of the sounds of the city that never seem to pass away until the day where you dare to glance up and come face to face with a brand new light.



1001 posts.

life will have its way with your pride

11.11.07


it amazes me that vancouver is still the only city ive been to that continues to display the worst kind of sentiment during Remembrance Day.  i commend people in the city for taking the time to attend ceremonies but every year it seems it gets worse.

everett and i went to Victory Square (pictured above) for the ceremony there.

apparently in Vancouver you can talk on your cellphone during the ceremony, it's ok to have your news helicopter buzz the entire ceremony, you can bring your kid with you and let him carry around a plastic uzi, you can sit under your umbrella and yell about rape and pillaging by the troops, and if youre a scenester then you must do your damndest to wear clothes that look like military regalia made out of leather and come from high couture, not take your hat of during O Canada, and last, the thing that confuses us the most, applaud throughout.

im pretty sure that most people with common sense would agree that this does not constitute a respectful ceremony.

so im really not too sure what to say here.  thanks to the city for holding the ceremony, but fuck you Vancouverites, this isn't a social event where you need to act like youre at a Jet Setters party.

i was there to pay tribute to members of my family affected by conflicts as were many others, but this was a shameful show of support and remembrance and i sincerely hope that if you are one of the guilty parties mentioned above, as many people as possible made you aware of your actions.  you are a disgrace and should be ashamed.

obviously lest we forget has lost all meaning on you.

on a totally unrelated matter, thanks to everett for hooking me up with Leopard. now i have a shiny dock.

zeros and ones

10.11.07


















































it was funny watching other people with cameras who never turned off their flash and looked all confused and bummed out when they took a picture and all they could really see was the shoulder of the person in front of them in a very bright way.

i have done two hours of econ already. now i will do more.

in no particular order whatsoever