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sh!thawks...on parade: 01.2008

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31.1.08

i have a cold. lame. not a bad one, but a cold nonetheless.
im also tres le tired. i just fell alseep for three hours and thought about ten minutes went by.
now ive got that whole post waking up from a nap blinking trying to wake up more thing going on.
i foresee dinner, xfiles, nyquil and sleep in the immediate future.

apparently everyone in my program is acting just like economic students because a card game proved that we dont trust each other and we'd fuck over everyone else for a better deal. and here we all thought we had such a good vibe going.

today was one of those days where no matter how much time you spend going through your entire ipod, you just cant find anything to suit your mood.

also, apparently i look like the type of guy who looks like a blogging stoner who wears rubber boots.

yeah.

my guess is as good as yours.

you dont know where ive been, Lou!

30.1.08


this is my new thinking hat. think of it as a large antenna. it gathers ideas on the large area that consists of the outer rim, whereupon, these ideas are then channeled up the sides of the outer wall where they then fall into a concentration reservoir in the center, which is then absorbed through a process much like osmosis into the thinking centers of my brain, providing me with greater cognitive ability to tackle overnight essay assignments.

prior to installing this antenna, the time forecast for completion of Doug's Marathon #1 was upwards of eight hours. since successfully installing and use of the antenna, that forecast has now been reduced by a margin of at least four hours.

and then i will catch up on some Discovery Channel.

they tryin' to put a juke joint in my house

29.1.08








how does one capitalize on a Snow Day? by shirking any previous responsibility to head outside for a snow fight that turns into a fort construction process with dwarfish little helpers from Johannesburg.

i left my place and as soon as i got outside i got all excited that it was a snow day and was pretty much running down the street thinking "SNOW DAY SNOW DAY SNOW DAY" in my head. i met jayme and jill over in north van to throw snow. and the fort. and of course flavoured hot chocolate.

and then off to chill out with Phaedra for a bit. neither of us had talked to each other on Duane's photowalk (who's having a blog war right now) so it was cool to just chill out and wonder about random stuff for a while.

now im eating pasta and listening to the oilers game.

i'll probably look up some alternative sources other than our readings for our Politics overnighter tomorrow later. and that'll turn into xfiles, but thats ok, i feel productive lately.

Stompin' Tom is not a Leafs Fan:



and im thinking i think too much


*in booming Evangelical type preacher voice*

reJOICE my friends, foah today NATURE has seen fit to bestoooow upon us a most benevolent SNOOOW DAY!

can i get an amen? AYYYY MEN TO THAT!

we must not question the will of the snow, NO, we must THANK THE SNOW for it has given unto us a most GLOOOORIOUS DAY! And only those who have strayed from the path of righteousness, only those who have LOST their WAY and have not SEEEEEEN the weather updates and campus CLOOOOSURES on the sfu website...

sadly for them friends, they have stumbled on the path to sleeping in. Thay have FALLEN on their backs tripping through the snow!

for them, there shall be no redemption. For THEM there shall BE no SLEEPING IN!

AYYY MEN!

And now Brothers and Sisters, go, go in peace to find your beds warm, your gaming systems ready, and your duties for the day suspended!

whether you are white or yellow

28.1.08


id managed to fend off any germs pretty well up until yesterday and then some sneaky little bastard dug himself in to the trenches. luckily i caught him early on with a barrage of juice, vitamin c and nyquil. his days are numbered.

i think one of these days im going to do a huge cleanup around here and just get rid of all the random shit i keep around that just takes up space. case in point, the ever growing pile of books, clothes and odds and end that were sitting on my dresser that's now sitting in yet another pile on my bed cause i forgot what was in there. it'll probably end right back on top of the dresser later because i wont be able to put it anywhere else.

i keep thinking it's tuesday. but it's not.

no no, dont take your pants off

27.1.08


i realize that people will be looking for a recap of last night, but honestly, i just don't feel up to it. i'm pretty sure i caught something yesterday and it hasn't been very nice.
so instead i'll do this.

last night was chad and danielle's engagement party. i realize that of all the people there, i've known them for a relatively short amount of time compared to most others. however, in the two years that i've known them outside of the wide world of the internets they've been nothing but welcoming, thoughtful, and helpful. aside from maybe getting hit with shoes and seeing the odd thing thrown off a balcony...

when they started their secretive tryst, i was one of the first to clue in, only to be silenced like Joey to their Monica and Chandler. i cant decide if it's a good thing or not that i can compare a good part of our friendship to a shitty sitcom that no one will ever forget, so in that case i'll go good just for posterity.

either way, through them i've met some of the other best friends i've ever had the pleasure of knowing. how do you even begin to compare that to anything?

if you've ever had the...i guess pleasure... of seeing them go at each other as only italian folk can, you'd probably have realized there was a spark of something special from the first time they yelled at each other about meat and pasta. the two of them are kind of infectious that way. even when they nag at each other it only makes you smile. and not only because it's funny to watch two people bitch about something totally pointless.

i know a lot of us were waiting expectantly for chad to bust out a ring. marlee even lost a bet over that. HAH EXTENSIONS HAH! anyway, when i was home for christmas and got a text message on the way back from going out for chinese food that said WE ARE ENGAGED! i was like GAWD FINALLY! and then i had to wait another two weeks before getting back to vancouver to say that in person, and another month until last night when we all rocked out air guitar style to celebrate chad's brainwashing of danielle. i kid. it's the other way around.

because of my coop position this summer, im going to miss out on the antics for the run up to the wedding, but i'll be back to give a jetlagged, hopped up on redbull, beer and advil congratulations after chad and danielle are for reals chad and danielle.

congrats to the both of you.

ps im telling your kids everything.

brakes forward here we go out and abound


there's a tire swing on the willow tree where i used to play when i was young.
someday it'll touch the ground.
we found it on the shore and took it home and painted it red with yellow ropes.
someday it'll touch the ground.
because the willow tree will be cut down.

causable deniability

26.1.08

i really wish this had been around when i was in high school. would have made all those debates in our religion classes all the more interesting.

now it's just sort of funny and scary at the same time.
random fact:

the most uncomfortable slash awkward situation i've ever been in is standing in a friend's apartment right when her roommate gets a phone call about how her mom was just killed after getting run over by a front end loader as she was crossing the street behind it.

hard to believe anything would beat Chad doing his Thriller dance in public while you're standing next to him....

24.1.08

this is the scarf my mom made for me over christmas. it's ten feet long, so it has adaptive uses like a scarf, a ninja face covering, or a sumo wrastler thing. and yes i said wrastler because that's what we say wherever we say that.

i have no classes on fridays, however, for the last three weeks i have yet to take full advantage of this because i've had to go downtown for meetings and research sessions and what not and tomorrow's no different. ok, well, i can sleep in, because really i only have to hand an assignment in, but since im there i might as well delve into the exciting world of statistical data series over time to narrow down an econometrics topic that i thought i had nailed down but apparently i missed the nail on that one. fack.

i've been listening to what i think is an odd combo of music lately consisting pretty much only of Massive Attack and Kenny Wayne Shepherd.

have you ever gotten so used to keeping something in one pocket that if for some reason you put it in your other pocket you start to wonder if you actually lost whatever it is that you didnt put in the usual pocket?

i keep thinking tomorrow is saturday. it's not. then i tell myself it's not, and i remember it's not, and five minutes later i think it is.

i also realized ive been living in vancouver for about four years and i have yet to do the following after telling myself i would:

-the Grind
-go to seattle
-make a successful solo trip to the island
-go snowboarding
-learn how to find anything in the west end
-go to the PNE
-go to whistler
-expand the number of drinking establishments i frequent much past the Blarney Stone and the Cambie
-been on speaker's corner
-gone to the Capilano Suspension Bridge
-done other stuff i cant think of right now.

now let's do one of those, 'i say what i havent done now you tell me what you havent done that you said you'd do' type things. SO WHAT HAVENT YOU DONT LATELY THAT IS EATING AWAY AT YOUR SOUL BECAUSE YOU TOLD YOURSELF YOU'D DO IT?

now crawl on what i think

23.1.08

im pretty sure this is the most amazing thing ive seen all day...



that's saying a lot isnt it?

bet he never went to band camp


inventory of items currently on the table:

-econometrics text, notepad, one blue pen, one four colour pen, one click pencil, one bottle of water, one iPod, one MacBook, two napkins, one plastic degree ruler, one styrofoam container of food court chinese food with chopsticks and plastic fork, one assignment explanation.

exciting. i know.

i've decided that i'm going to stay in the lab until 6pm as many days as i can to do work.

exciting. i know.

we're driving

22.1.08

Actor Heath Ledger dead
Police probe star's death

Ledger's Death Appears Accidental

HEATH LEDGER DEAD

Actor Heath Ledger dies in NYC

Heath Ledger, Actor, Is Found Dead at 28

Republican Fred Thompson drops out of presidential race

i'm sure i don't have to point out the fact that something is wrong when the only news site i looked at today that had a story about a presidential candidate ranked higher than a dead actor was the CBC...

one of these things is not important like the others

21.1.08


i'll get this thing sorted out yet. haloscan doesn't like the new layout. i'll get that fixed. til then, take it in slow, sometimes these big changes can hurt your head.

*****

got it sorted out. enjoy.

also, i'd just like to say that not only have i managed to redo this entire thing, ive also put 70 pages of problem definition and policy analysis frameworks readings in my head.

the birdman wouldn't lie

i have nothing to say today.
thanks for stopping by though.

20.1.08



really, when you think about it, Rodham is not the kind of name you'd want tacked to a president because not only is it a rod of ham, it's just to kosher for an entire section of the American public.

you really need to listen to this interview with George Bush to hear some interesting things he's had to say of late.

You should also read this article by Ira Chernus on the faith game being played in the current presidential race. on thursday we touched on this in our Poli class where i made the case that a fundamental difference in the organization and implementation of public policy in Canada vs the US is that here we don't have to craft our leadership abilities and political will around Christian doctrines.

in other news i am supposed to phone my mom now.

tattooed on everything

19.1.08

Cloverfield viewing tips:

1. Dramamine.
2. keep a running count of all the people who leave.
3. pay as much attention to everything as possible.
4. tell me where i can find a good picture of the monster so i can get a really good look at it because i really dont understand it yet.
5. stay past the credits.

it was good, didnt really live up to 6 months worth of hype and a super extensive viral campaign (which btw was pretty wicked in of itself), and im not sure how well it'll translate to a tv, but it wasnt total shit.

18.1.08

i have four months to enjoy scenes like this because after that i'm off to Dhaka, Bangladesh on a CIDA internship.

yes, indeed it's true, after an adjudicating meeting with three profs i'll be one of two people heading around the world for the summer on taxpayer dollars.

what could possibly be better?

the impending viewing of Cloverfield, says I.  well, maybe not better, but it's up there. six months is a long goddamn wait for a movie. anyway, im currently sitting by a very large window at the Renaissance Coffee in the Cornerstone building up at SFU because i ran around like mad earlier doing shit that i thought would take more time and it took not as much time so now i have more time to kill.

windows like this are fun because you can see everyone who walks by. take for instance my friend nancy who just walked by outside who i havent seen in forever who didnt look inside. take for a second instance that super hot girl that just walked by and DID look in and smile right back. if microsoft could make windows this good, there'd never be problems.

this is the second time today ive had to kill some time. earlier four of us went to the Movieland Arcade on granville after an hour and a half library session on database mining...fun... i never used to go to arcades at all really. now there's the odd time where a few of us go to play racing games and Big Buck Hunter. which was actually pretty funny because Dan came with us for the first time ad couldnt shoot for shit cause he wasnt reloading fast enough so i told him to pretend the pump was his dick and that he was whacking off and wouldnt you know it, he reloaded wayyyyy faster after that.

...

no interesting people have walked by in the last few seconds. this window is losing its usefulness aside from letting light in.

ok, some girl just walked by with one of those gigantic shoulder bag purse things. i dont understand those. seriously, are they a purse, are they a bag are they a body bag? do you really need a suitcase to go to school every day?

maybe i'll go get a brownie...

team ninja boots?

16.1.08





today we're going to talk about climate change. more specifically we're going to talk about why i think vegetarians contribute more to global warming than people who eat meat.

This discussion will not be so broad as to indirect contributions of vegetarians through the need for more agricultural processing to be done for them. Instead, it will focus directly on the production of GHG's, or greenhouse gasses.

While much hyped in the media, what exactly constitutes a GHG? In short, a GHG is a gaseous emission that, one present in the Earth's atmosphere, contributes to what is known as the 'greenhouse effect', or the warming of the Earth through the trapping of certain types of radiation such as infrared.

Thus we can easily deduce that in order to be considered a GHG, a gaseous substance must be emitted directly into the atmosphere.  It now becomes important to determine which gas or gasses are considered to belong to this group.

A large number of gasses can be considered culprits here, but the Big Three that make up most GHG emissions are, in order of volume, Carbon Dioxide, Methane, and Nitrous Oxide.

Now consider the following: human beings expel Carbon Dioxide after an inhalation. Therefore, we can deduce that all people are contributing to GHG emissions through the act of exhalation. We can further deduce that people who have dental work done are often given Nitrous Oxide to dull any pain. Therefore, we can surmise that people who have dental work done are far guiltier than those people who simply exhale.

This, of course, leaves Methane gas, the second most abundant GHG, left to consider. By examining this gas we will be able to show how vegetarians contribute more to global warming than non vegetarians.

Methane gas is a composite gas of what we commonly call Flatulence. This gas is produced in the body when foods are digested in the gastrointestinal tract and is expelled through the anus in a, sometimes audible, burst.  Not all foods will produce methane when digested. It is this distinction that is important for this discussion.

What foods do in fact cause the Flatule Effect? Common foods that contribute to methane gas formation and expulsion in the human body are broccoli, brussels sprouts, asparagus, carrots, apricots, raisins, cauliflower, radishes, bananas, prunes, eggplant, bran, nuts and legumes, cabbage, celery, cucumbers, kohlrabi, rutabaga, turnip, garlic, leeks, fennel, sunflower seeds, poppy seeds, beans, peas, mushrooms, onions, artichokes, pears, wheat, cheese, apples, corn, and potatoes to name a few.

It is important to note the lack of any meats present in the aforementioned brief list of Flatule Effect producing foods.

We can now deduce that, pound for pound, vegetarians must consume greater amounts of food in the list to ingest the same amount of nutrients taken in by an omnivorous diet. A comparison would simply be that a vegetarian must eat more beans during one meal in order to gain the same nutritional benefits as someone who included a ten ounce Rib Eye steak in their meal.

Thus we can infer that because vegetarians must consume greater quantities of flatulence producing foods, that during digestion they will in fact produce a higher volume of methane gas needing to be expelled than a meat eater. This larger volume of gas then exits the body by way of an odorous discharge and enters the atmosphere. Once this has occurred, the methane expelled from the vegetarians' body is now considered a composite gas of GHG emissions.

Simplified, we see that:

VD = +FPF = +MGP = +GHG

where VD = Vegetarian Diet, +FPF = Increased Consumption of Flatulence Producing Foods, +MGP = Increased Methane Gas Production, +GHG = Increased levels of Greenhouse Gas Emissions.

Conclusively, it can be argued that, while vegetarians claim to have better diets than their meat eating counterparts, they are contributing to the slow death of the world by farting more than the rest of us.

4 giggity

15.1.08

today was one of those days where you're super tired all day and then you have to run around all over the place looking for one thing and no where you go has it and you're like "goddamn, this really shouldn't be this hard."

i bet it was an omen about the oilers losing tonight.

i think after class tomorrow im going to head down to stanley park and take some pictures, it's supposed to be not too bad out tomorrow.

process the process

14.1.08

so post photowalk there were six of us who sat around for some food and i overheard how to make an HDR image. so i gave it a shot. i think it looks decent. apparently the weather for the rest of the week is supposed to be pretty decent, so i can go experiment.

rhythm in the veins

13.1.08




























went on a photowalk. there were lots of people there i did not know not counting chad danielle duane and corinna. next time im going to talk to more people because i didnt really and i ought to have.

that dog is named Cello. a first i heard Cholo. and then Jello. but it's Cello. im not really a big dog person, and i wasnt sure about Cello until Cello started to steal the water out of the bucket that said not to steal the bucket. then Cello was pretty cool. Cello's owner was one of the people i did not know and didnt ask her name. which i probably should have.

i think it's funny when you're out at a pub with a whole bunch of people you know and spend pretty much every day with and you're talking to one person and they're like "you have a girlfriend dont you?" and youre like "um, no." and then they're all super surprised like it's the most surprising thing they've ever heard. i dunno it seems funny sort of.

i lost my umbrella at some point this weekend. it was just one of those things where you put it down and then it totally slips your mind after you leave that you forgot it. tomorrow i'll have to get another one because it's pretty much a necessity in this city in the winter.

just give him a cookie and no one gets drooled