you cant just park a boat

dumb neighbours are funny cause they offer free entertainment.
"hey you have a trampoline now?"
"yeah!"
"jumped off the roof yet?"
"yeah! here we'll show you!"

so my mom and sister are in montreal. they phone tonight and as my convo with my mom wraps up she asks if i want anything from there and i say no, are you sure...well...

"if you can get me a poster from club super sexe that'd be cool."

and ladies and gentlemen, the most motherly response you could ever hope to hear to that request...

"oh. what's that?"

ask your daughter.

i found a zip hoodie at work. no one claimed it so i kept it. it's nice. brown. i like it im keeping it. its a heavier one so it'll be good for the fall.

whenever i buy a hoodie i always pull the drawstring our of the hood. i hate drawstrings on hoods. seriously, who EVER uses them? and when you dont use them all they do is flap around and be annoying so i just rip 'em right out.

i sat on the front step with my dad for a few hours listening to more stories from long ago that rival Animal House in shinanigannery. i shit you not. that movie has nothing on the frat my dad was in.

"you tell me these stories so i wont do these things right?"

"you shouldnt do these things because you could get caught....and that would be bad....i never ever got blamed for the peeing off the roof onto the old lady's house because i was with three fat hawaiians and she told the police there were a bunch of big large men up there. who'd notice a skinny little shit like me?"

"so...i just need fatter friends."


havent been caught yet. it almost seems sounter productive telling me every single little detail of how to pull shit off because most likely i wont ever forget and at some point, there's always an opportunity to be shit disturber extraordinaire. however, yes, id have to say the maybe getting arrested would probly suck.

meh. only live once.

you cant just park a boat