completely without something

the worst doomsayers are your own thoughts. keeping you up at night with threats of uncertainty, making you wait up staring at the phone wanting it to ring, making the light in the window in the morning look cold. leaning on walls. leaning on walls what... they're the things that keep throwing sounds in your ears and sights in your eyes.
they;re the things that make you wonder what you actually see when you take a good hard look in the mirror and try to ask yourself what's there and you have a hard time finding an answer.
i have shelves and drawers and places to hang things. it's a compact landscape. a lot of the time it seems like im just along for the ride, watching from somewhere inexplicable. sometimes im the oddball sometimes im right in the mix sometimes im sitting in a park at night.
it's strange to hang on the thought that youre 24 and all you own by way of furniture are three ikea shelves and some milk crates.
im also bound and determined to discover a way to tell everything there is to know about a person based on their preference for either smarties or skittles.
if things made sense all the time that would be nonsensical.

completely without something